


Sozin´s Curse

by LeeamDevin



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe, POV Azula (Avatar)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2020-08-23 17:11:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20246377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeeamDevin/pseuds/LeeamDevin
Summary: Azula experiences difficulties to control herself during her daily training. Something is affecting her and she is concerned, as the Fire Lord does not tolerate failure or weakness.





	1. Chapter I: Dementophobia

It is a cool winter morning as Azula makes her Katas in the palace garden. She is clad in pure white robes, completed by gloves and fine white shoes, all made of the same, delicate fabric.  
The only disruption in her attire are the golden Fire Nation crown, that holds the princess´s dark hair tightly under control and the golden necklace with the dark red ruby she received on the day of her first birthday from the Firelord.  
The amber eyes of the princess narrow as she struggles with herself. She still remembers the first time she had to do this exercise, focus the Chi in her body for firebending, yet keep the energy under control so no flame forms.  
She had burned her hand that day and her father had looked at her with disgust. Her mother had not even looked at her. The six year old girl had shivered under her father´s gaze more than from the pain and since that day never burned herself again.

But something had changed these days. Azula was uneasy for some time now and it got worse. As long as the sun lit the world everything was fine, but with dusk came the feeling. It was like a cold, damp blanket that was thrown over her soul, as if her inner self lost its color and shape with the darkening world and turned grey and gloomy. The cool, calculating Azula that she had shaped herself into vanished. She managed to keep the outside look, but inside her the emotions boiled each night. The girl felt things that she could not explain. Some kind of sadness, that weakened her body and mind, drowned her inner strength and made her Chi flow slow down and almost cut her off. Then there were outburst of fury, fear, rage and then somehow moments of tranquility, where she could almost...see things that escaped the eye. It was as if something waits just outside the grasp of her mind for the right moment to slip into place, like a key in the lock.

The wind plays with the strands of Azula´s hair and carries with it the salty smell of the sea, that reminds her...

...of the crushed shipwrecks at Kyoshi Island as the dolphin piranhas preyed on the dead and wounded of her people

...of the long gone days at Ember Island. A faint huff escapes Azula´s lips as she pushes the thought aside and lets the Chi swell in her fingers, ready to burst out of her body in a stream of blue fire, there she balances the energy by sheer power of will and focus, as she spins around on one foot and elegantly points two fingers at the imaginary target, to then hop up and kick thin air, again making her firebending moves, with her Chi held at the edge of bursting out, never allowing it to leave of float back inside. The exercise is actually much more exhausting than real bending, what is one of the reasons for her to do it.  
Long years of training allow her to move on the soft grass like a ghost, while she feels every stone and clump of grass through the thin shoes.  
She makes a salto and bends without flames, sweat glistens on her forehead by now. The exercise is still taking and the focus hard to keep up while making all these moves, she will need in a real fight.  
It is even harder as she had not much sleep this night.  
A nightmare that she couldn´t really recall as she opened her eyes had woken her early. And as she lay there in her bed, one had cramped around her own throat she had experienced a weird, scary moment where she didn´t even know who she was.

I am Azula, daughter of the Firelord and heir to the throne!

She recalls that moment against her own will. Panic that slowly faded back. Still the feeling of threat and danger remained.  
Usually she could open her windows and let the rising sun burn away her newfound feelings.  
This morning the feeling had withstood the sun and carried on till now.

And then it happenes. A small spark forms and turns the white glove on Azula´s left hand dark, then the fabric starts to burn.  
She freezes in the bending pose, her eyes stare at the spreading flame.  
"Azula!" she hears the two old hags behind her.  
"You are starting..."  
"...to loose it."  
They say, finishing each other´s sentences as usually. And usually Azula doesn´t care. Li and Lo are trusted servants of her family and she has known them for her whole life.  
But now they witness Azula fail at an exercise she has mastered years ago. That burns inside her as her will reaches out with the build up anger and frustration to push she heat of the flames outside, making the flames grow substantially.  
The old women stare at Azula as she turns around to them, her hand now covered in the burning glove, yet she does not seem to notice...or care.  
"I KNOW!" she shouts at them and blows at the burning glove, her breath is a faint, bluish flame that scorches the rest of the glove off her hand and turns it into flakes of ashes that are dancing in the wind. Her hand is soft and unscathed as the flames die out.  
Then with blazing amber eyes she starts to walk over to the two, who stand near the pond next to a small tree. Zuko had loved that place...Azula can recall that picture of him...with mother. They had seemed so happy there, mother had smiled and laughed, hugged her son and been the perfect image of a loving parent...for Zuko.  
"Enough of this nonsense for today!" she hisses at the two, who shake their heads in unison.  
"You need..."  
"...to finish your training."  
"now more than ev...." 

They stop as Azula suddenly starts to wave her arms in long, drawn out bows around her. Blue energy sizzles under her fingers as Azula seperates Ying and Yang.  
"I´m quite ready!" she shouts out as she points her fingers at the two. Both women duck and hug each other as Azula´s lightning jumps of her fingers, over the two women´s heads and rips the upper half of the tree apart. Azula gives the view a cold smile. That was her first time with a working lightning and it made clear to the two, that Azula does not need any more of their useless exercises.  
Still shocked Li and Lo watch with big eyes as Azula storms at them. Without stopping or even slowing down she raises one foot, slips the shoe off, repeats the same with the other one and then, again without slowing down a little, rips the robes and remaining glove off her body, so she is clad in nothing but her undergarments. The golden necklace with the delicately crafted flame of the Fire Nation seems to glow in the sunlight as she reaches the two, the dove egg sized ruby makes it look like a living flame that burns on her chest.  
"Now excuse me" she says in a still angered, but mostly annoyed voice as she balls the cloth in her hands and throws it up in the air, where she obliterates her clothes with a flash of fire, that trickles over Li and Lo as fine ashes.  
"But I need a change."  
With that she turns around and leaves the intimidated old women alone, as the poor tree cracks behind them and falls into the pond, what makes the two women shriek out.

Still infuriated, mostly about herself, although she had no intention let anyone know that, Azula openes the door to her chambers.  
The room is dark, the servants had, after they took care of the large bed, shut the heavy curtains and as Azula closes the door behind her, darkness takes reign. She still walkes through the room, she kows her own chambers well and her senses are sharp. Father would not approve of any carelessness of his daughter. Training had helpled to make the young girls easily find her path in dim light or even with her other senses. She should never be taken off guard by something as puny as darkness.  
And in the twilight of her room she can see well enough...

...the corpses of the fallen. Burned, maimed and crushed in the brutal melee under the city.

...to find her desk near the window. She takes a seat at the chair standing next to it and looks into the mirror. A faint shiver makes the mirror image dance in front of her eyes. Azula frownes. The figure in the mirror looks like...

...the skeletonized body of her old teacher 

...it is glowing softly. Startled by the view Azula bends forward as she thinks to see a glow in her mirror image´s eyes.

Terror

With a shriek the princess jumps on her feet.

Sadness

She stumbles backwards, the chair seems to have turned into a beast with arms that grabs her feet.

Loneliness

She falls on the heavy curtain with a loud thud, shivering helplessly.

HATE!

Darkness takes her away and she dreams of a dark, red sky and the cries of the dying air nomads.


	2. The Firelors´s long shadow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Avatar has returned

"Azula!"  
With a groan she opened her eyes. Sunlight lies heavily on her face. The warm sun of the early afternoon.  
How long has she been...and what has she been? The princess raises slowly, her head aches and images haunt her dazed mind, that still tries to recover from, whatever that had been.  
"Azula...please"   
The voices of Li and Lo are pleading. For how long have they calling for her? How long till they will call the guard to break her door to find...a mess.  
The room looks like a storm hit it. The bedsheets lay all over the room, her chair is broken, just like the remains of her mirror. The curtains are ripped into shreds, so the sun can flood the scene.  
"Go away!" Azula shouts with anger in her voice, that she doesn´t feel. She is confused, even frightened. Has she done this?  
Or someone else?  
The girl´s eyes dart from corner to corner of the room. Nobody in here, but her. The window? Way too high to climb...still.  
"Azula...your father wants to see you."  
Now for a moment the princess´s face looses control and show shock. She can see herself in the shards of the mirror. Still in her undergarments, her hair hanging all over her head. She looks like she had been sleeping through the day...or had a very close encounter with someone.  
"I will meet him in a moment." she shouts at the door, while she runs through the room to collect her clothes.  
"He wants to see you now...in the throne room!"  
The old hags are relentless, driven by a fear greater than the one of Azula. Of course, her father knows how to drive everyone to their maximum, even, or especially his daughter.   
In great haste Azula slips into her attire, the robes of the Firenation with the heavy belt wrapped around her slender waist, followed by a cloak. As she wants to take care of her hair she realizes that the golden crown, the nation´s emblem, is missing. Cursing quietly she is close to panic...she can´t face father like that. What would he say...what would he do if she looked worse than Zuko after his Agni Kai?  
Endless relief fills her as she finds the damn thing under the bed and just leaves her hair open, a clear break with her disciplined style, but better than the raven´s nest it had been before.  
She sees her reflection...she looks just like her mother.   
Her lips shiver and she feels the urge to rip the crown and a fistfull of hair out. The knocking at the door saves her as she finally leaves the room and locks the door behind her.

The imposing hall in the heart of the palace is dark, despite the flames surrounding her father. In fact the flames are the only source of light at all, turning the Firelord into a shade of flame and shadow. Azula kneels in her father´s large shadow, casted by the wall of flames behind him, while the fire between him and his daughter makes it impossible to see more than his shape.  
Azula had always thought that her father looked like a god through this. Today she feels ashamed. It was a trick, a well done trick of light and shadow, but still just a tool of intimidation and control. She is ashamed that it took her so long to really see this. And she is...hurt. Why does he feel the need to use the presence of his throne room on her? They are alone in the large hall, no guards, no servants, no advisors or council.  
Her eyes are focused on the ground, her hair flows over her shoulders like a stream of dark silk. He surely notices that...what does he think? Does he think she was caught off guard during a change, after a bath maybe? Does he think she now tries to become more like her mother?  
The thought alone tries to make her grit her teeth, but Azula´s face is a perfect mask of obedience and respect.   
Or does he see the confusion that her loss of consciousness has left?  
And then he speaks. His voice is impressive. Azula knows the value of a good voice. She can sound innocent, absolutely honest and open, tease and infuriate with well dosed taunt or whip with the cold steel of her threats.  
But father´s voice is like a saw that can cut through the soul. She knows that she will never have such a tool for herself. She admires it...yet today she notices not the controlled rip in his voice, but something...unfamiliar.

"A falcon has arrived. From Crescent Island."

Azula can see the temple right in front of her. The picture is clear, even intimate. The home of the Fire Sages, spineless lickspittles, who betrayed their course at the first sign or trouble.  
Now she almost frowns. She has never set foor on the island and the sages...she never had much to do with them. Yet she feels...betrayed by them. By servants of the Firelord, that in hundred years, never gave her family a reason to doubt their loyalty.

"The Avatar has returned!"

Azula´s eyes widen a little. Not in surprise, but because of all the implications. It should be a surprise, yet all she thinks of is what it means. For her, if her brother returns with the Avatar in chains.  
He still is the firstborn of the Firelord, only his banishment has given her the place under the sun she enjoys now. And the knowledge, that father loves her more than Zuko, as long as he is in banishment, as long she can rest. Or at least, she could till now.

"What is your command, father?" Azula asks without looking up or showing any change in voice or posture.  
Her mind races. For a moment she is back to her old self, every weird feeling, every strange incident is pushed aside as she evaluates her possibilities and der father´s potential intentions. He called her in, alone and probably before he told anyone of the message from the sages. He trusts her and Azula has worked hard to earn that trust. Now she needs to watch her step and keep it.

"We need to take action. It can´t be a coincidence, that he shows up now, as we are so close."

Her father says and Azula nods. Yes, the timing is...interesting. It is still a lot of time till the comet´s rising, but compared to the century the Avatar has been absent it is just a moment. The avatar must feel the need to strike now.

Before the unspeakable happens again.

Azula fights to keep her face calm. A voice in her mind, like her own thoughts, but stranger, feeling like fingers in her head. Whatever happens...it´s getting worse.

"We can push our plans, take out the North and strike deep in the Earth Kingdom. If we get our military in with full force..."

Azula starts. She has plans ready, stored in her mind, so she can cover up the rising panic with her insights on strategy. But as she struggles with the experience of a voice in her head, her father shakes his head.

"I admire your enthusiasm, Azula. But we have made our plans with the comet. The industry won´t deliver the amount of materials for a full scale strike without the comet."

Azula raises her head.  
"Let me take care of that. I can inspect our factories, get us some output ready till summer and at the same time we can raid the Erath Kingdom´s shipyards at Xian Te to keep our advantage, no matter what the enemy does over the course of the year.  
Let me be the sword in your right hand and demise of your enemies."

Her eyes meet her father´s shape, surrounded by the flames of his throne room. She feels herself sweating and just wants out here, now. She knows, that her father never served in the military. Unlike her traitor uncle. And Azula believes, that her father regrets that, if anything in his life. He won´t reject her on this for sure. Then she can get some space, find her self control...and get rid of whatever haunts her.

Her father shifts in front of her.

"Yes...you are ready.   
We will leave tomorrow morning."

A cold feeling runs down the princess´s spine.

"We...father?" she asks and can´t hide her surprise completely.

"The homeland needs to be reminded, that we are at war. We will visit our servants and make some...adjustments."

Azula nods, smiles at her father. And before these flashes of emotion and now...a voice, her smile would have been genuine.

The spirits never forget!


End file.
